Oct 8, 2020
Conquering Your ‘One Thing’ and How to Start Today
Each of us has that ‘one thing’ that nags at us. It looms around us — showing up in bed when we lay down at night and lurking in the corners of our minds as we first wake up. It’s with us at work, on our drive home, while watching tv or making dinner for the kids.
Chances are, you are already thinking about your ‘one thing’ and maybe even more. That thing that may have been around for years, in some cases our entire lives, reminding us why we aren’t our best selves, or holding us back from feeling completely happy. Why don’t we learn how to solve our internal problems? Is it because we are taught that feelings of inadequacy or negativity shouldn’t get attention? That we should stuff them down and cover them with dirt deep inside and put on a smile?
Did you know that ‘one thing’ is what is standing between where you are now and where you want to be? It might just be the only thing holding you back. The exciting news is that you CAN overcome that ‘one thing.’
Goals are something we reach for — like a ripe apple in a tree. We all make goals for ourselves but we often are guilty of overcomplicating that goal and adding a bunch of unnecessary “noise” to it. I hear people everyday tell me why they can’t succeed in something that, truthfully, barely matters to them. We lie to ourselves better than the best litigator ever could. I’m guilty of it as well.
Why, for example, do a 30 day “ab challenge” if you know you are 20 pounds overweight? You might tell yourself that doing something is better than doing nothing — but is it? I agree that trying and failing, or not reaching the end, is better than never trying at all. We do learn from those efforts and they can move the needle of our life compass in the right direction. However, we’re crowding our efforts with unnecessary ‘noise’ and it is rarely the best way to meet our goal.
My journey has been an example to understand why some get to taste the apple and some never do. I used to be fat. Yes I said it — fat. I was 100 pounds overweight. It was in everything I did. If you have never been fat, it typically starts when you wake up and some part of your sheets or clothing is folded in a place it shouldn’t be. It reminds you in every single movement, activity and conversation until it is time to go to bed, and you put on a pair of shorts that fit last week but not today.
All at once it hit me. No more. I would no longer do the big and little things I knew were keeping me from a healthy body and mind. For me, it was an extreme crash diet that was the final straw. I stopped making “goals” that didn’t directly address my ‘one thing’ and instead focused my efforts on conquering the nagging condition that would not leave me alone. Every decision I made I said to myself “Will this move me closer to or further away from my goal?” Within one year I had shed 92 pounds of excess weight.
Back to YOUR one thing. I imagine it is now front and center in your mind. Own it. Revel in it. Let it take you over for a moment. Close your eyes and think about the day your one thing is gone. Can you see it? That day when your one thing is gone? Are you smiling at the thought of it? What are you willing to sacrifice to get there? I gave up one year to understand the pursuit of my physical health. Would you?
Next comes the hard part — what to do first. I know it feels that there is so much to accomplish, to remove and to change to in order to get THERE. You might be thinking, “how could I ever do that?” Anxiety sets in, either now or down the road, with an overwhelming feeling of the pending failure. I get it! Trust me, I do.
Start with a pen and a piece of paper and turn it sideways. The left side is today, the right side is your goal. Decide a realistic time frame to achieve your goal to master that ‘one thing.’ Now you have it. It’s been spoken. It’s real. It’s staring back at you from the page.
Next, work backwards. Break your goal up into tiny bite size simple tasks. Ask yourself what you can do today to get you closer to your goal.
Need some inspiration or an example to help get started? Here is something I used to reach a personal goal- to run a 5k in three months.
After looking at the picture, you can see it’s all small tasks — small tasks that would lead me to my goal of running a 5k. The top part is general things I want to do daily (amount of water and sleep habits). Below that, I broke up the three months into weekly goals. I would get much more specific here but you can see how running a 5k in 90 days starts simply with jogging for just five minutes today.
Using this type of formula, what is your one thing and how will you overcome it? Comment below, and let Verb help you stay accountable with free text-based check ins and inspiration.
